Emotional Abuse: Puts down abused, name calls, mind games,
mental coercion, extreme controlling behaviors, withholds affection, causes
abused to lose identity.
Female Privilege: Demeans men, believes women are superior
to men, tells jokes that put men down, believes men are helpless, treats
husband like child.
Financial Abuse: Vehicles and property in abuser’s name
only, spends money of abused, uses credit or savings to make abused dependent,
restricts employment of abused, makes abused ask for money, gives abused
allowance, requires accounting for every penny spent.
Humiliations: Hostile humor, publicly humiliates,
criticizes, degrades appearance, parenting skills, housekeeping, cooking, etc.
Intimidation: Uses looks, actions, gestures, and voice to
rouse fear, argues continuously, demands that victim says what he/she wants to
hear.
Isolation: Controls what is done, who is seen, who is talked
to, limits or listens in on phone calls, sabotages car, restricts outside
interests, restricts access to mail.
Knowledge Abuse: Uses Knowledge gained through therapy,
seminars, and self help books to abuse spouse, but doesn’t take responsibility
for personal behaviors.
Male Privilege:
Treats spouse like servant, makes all of the decisions, acts like
“master of the castle,” insists upon defining roles that elevate him
subordinates her.
Medical Abuse: Inflicts wounds and does not allow medical
treatment, medical treatment denied for normal health issues.
Physical Abuse: Beating, biting, choking, grabbing, kicking,
pinching, pulling hair, restraining, scratching, shaking, shoving, slapping,
twisting arms, using weapons.
Power: Denies basic rights, uses the law to enforce power,
deprives victim of private or personal life, mandates duties, controls
everything.
Property Violence: Punches walls, destroys property, breaks
down doors, pounds tables, abuses pets, etc.
Religious Abuse: Treats scripture as a weapon, specifically
words such as “submission” and “obey,” uses spiritual language to manipulate
and control.
Responsibility Abuse: Makes victim responsible for
everything in life, for example: bills, parenting, etc.
Sexual Abuse: Demands bizarre sexual acts, commits physical
attacks, treats spouse as a sex object, interrupts sleep for sex, forces sex,
exhibits extreme jealousy.
Silence: Uses silence as a weapon, does not communicate,
does not express emotion.
Stalking: Spies on the abused, follows the victim to places
and activities, displays extreme distrust and jealousy.
Threats: Threatens to end the relationship, threatens
emotional or physical harm, threatens life, threatens to take children,
threatens to commit suicide. Uses Children: Relays messages through children, uses
visitation rights to harass, uses child support as leverage.
Verbal Abuse: Curses, accuses, name-calls, uses past to
control and manipulate, commits mental blackmail, makes unreasonable demands.
Sociologist Murray Straus states that the true rate of
physical abuse within marriages involves approximately 50% or 60% of all
marriages, rather than the 28% who report it.
